The Hardest Part
by Just Dessy
Summary: Some times the hardest part isn't letting go, but embracing something new. SLASH
1. Chapter 1

The Hardest Part

**Summary: **Some times the hardest part isn't letting go, but embracing something new.

**Warning:** D/s themes, Male/Male loving, M-preg and Violence.

**Pairings:** John/Zack...for now.

**Part One**

John moved the ice pack in small circled over Zack's shoulder. Even though this was for a new storyline that creatives _created_ in the matter of hours to keep some heat on John until Wrestlemaina the pains and bruises his lover incurred on his behalf were all too real and John had to force himself not to overreact while on camera. The latest 'plot twist' had put an awkward spin on their already strained relationship. John kissed Eve; correction John had a make out session with Eve and that was not part of the fucking script and Zack was pissed. Eve had hooked her talons into his man and made him stick his tongue down her throat when all was needed was a simple little kiss.

Vince thought it was very creatives on her part and was going to reward her for her ingenious thinking. Zack had a few choice words for her ingenious thinking!

"Zack talk to me babe." John said as he removed the ice pack from the bruised flesh and gave a little kiss to the cold skin.

"What do you want me to say?" Zack mumbled.

John sighed. "Anything, please. I'm not used to you being so quiet...I'm afraid."

"Afraid?" Zack turned towards his lover, his eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about?"

"This damn storyline! You haven't come to bed with me in nearly two weeks and we're just not clicking anymore. Do you want to..." John said, there it was out in the open – the question he had been dreading.

"What, No...NO John no! I faught too hard for you to notice me, for you to take me seriously. For you to love me and not that bitch you married. For you to be mine; for some hoeski to step in between us." Zack said, eyes never leaving Johns.

"It's more than that Eve thing an you know it." John got up an paced the length of the small locker room.

Zack's eyes followed his lovers frame sadly. He knew it was way more than Eve, Eve was just the icing on the cake. It all boiled down to Kane. Kane had cornered him in his locker room while John was wrestling Mark Henry. Kane threw him against the wall and just held him there, Zacks attempts to break the hold only made Kane's choke hold stronger until he was left gasping just to breathe. What unnerved Zack was what happened just as John entered the room; Kane kissed him. His body reacted before his brain and he was left with an obvious hard on as Kane let him go before walking out the door but not before stopping next to John saying; "Embrace it, Cena."

Since that night Zack hadn't let John touch him sexually. He was confused, his heart loved John, but something had been there when Kane kissed him...forcibly held him against that wall. Sometimes, before that even happened, Zack had wanted John to get rougher with him and he always wondered what it would be like and he finally gotten a small taste even though it wasn't from the man he loved.

"I just don't know what to do anymore." John finally said.

Zack was worrying his lip with John looked back at him. He swallowed hard, god how he loved that mouth – especially when it was wrapped around any part of him. He missed kissing that man, he missed holding his man at night, hell he just missed the easy feeling he had with Zack.

"You know we've got four days off...how about we head out to stay with our favorite country boys?" Zack asked.

A vacation...just what they needed.

"Lemme call an see, but I don't see why not." John said, smiling.

Those dimples...how he always got lost in them. Before John could pull his cell phone out Zack was across the room kissing his man hard. John groaned into the kiss before he turned and slammed Zack into the wall behind them. Zack hissed into the kiss when his shoulder hit the wall but wrapped his arms around John's middle tighter so he wouldn't let go. Just as things looked like they were going to get interesting the door slammed open and Zack eyes widened as Kane stood in the entry.

"Cena, Cena, Cena...when will you learn to embrace MY hate?" Kane roared as he ripped John from Zack's embrace.

Zack stood frozen in shock as he watched Kane punch his lover in the jaw before throwing his against the wall where he slid down, his own shocked eyes starring at Zack's – pleading with him to get out of there. Before Zack could move Kane was on him, pressing him against the wall; trapping him.

"Embrace MY hate Zack." Kane whispered in his ear before he kissed him again.

The kiss didn't last long and before he knew it Kane was gone and it was just John and him alone in the little dressing room. Zack slid to the floor, eyes locked with John's and his eyes stung as tears threatened to burst from the dam of his eyelids.

John stared at his lover as the silence embraced them in ways that hate could never.


	2. Chapter 2

**The Hardest Part**

**Summary:** Some times the hardest part isn't letting go, but embracing something new.  
**Warning:** D/s themes, Male/Male loving, M-preg and Violence.  
**Pairings:** John/Zack...for now.

* * *

**Part Two:** The Hilton Hotel Room Number Unknown;city not important

He was on his back with John above, spreading him out and he was reduced to a blissful puddle of goo. The headboard banged against the wall and his eyes nearly rolled to the back of its socket when John rutted roughly against his hidden spot, something he never done before; at least not so hard but dear lord did it feel good! His teeth were buried deep into his bottom lip as he tried not to scream, but the look on his lovers face told him he would be before this was over with.

"Zack..." John growled, teeth clenched in tortured ecstasy.

All he could do was whimper and grope blindly for an anchor to let him know this was real an not some day dream. It felt like he was being claimed, a possession just for Johns pleasure and he was more than fine with that.

"So close..." Followed closely with, "You better cum with me Zack...cum damn it, cum!"

An once again his body acted before his mind could react.

"Kane!"

Pearly white ribbons decorated his sweaty beating chest yet he felt frozen. John had moved away an was staring at him in barely hidden pain an shock.

"Do not...do not tell me you just said what you said!" John said, slowly. "Because if you do...Kane Zack? Fucking Kane!"

Zack flinched as he reached towards John an his hand was shook off with force.

"I'm sorry baby, please...god please believe me I didn't mean it...I..I.."

"Shut up, just fucking shut up with the lies! Why are you doing this to me? Are you that mad at me, huh? Is this about...about ...god I'm sorry, I'm sorry but I can't do this tonight." John whispered.

An Zack was left with a numb feeling in the pit of his heart. He knew John was done, past done, by the quiet tone of his voice. He always knew things were gonna be okay when John was his usual loud over emotional self, yet he didn't know about this time an it scared him more than anything he ever faced in life yet.

"I'll go,"

He didn't bother to pack a bag, he simply pulled some discarded clothes on an left the room silently. On the bed John finally let lose that famous temper of his; his fist were raw an bloodied by the time he was done wailing on wall. There was a hole left, what had stopped him in the first place, but luckily it was the wall to bathroom an he would leave a 'tip' to cover the repair. He was spent, emotionally – physically and mentally. In his state nothing sounded more appropriate than drinking away his sorrows. Heading down towards the bar area of the hotel he rounded the corner towards the elevators to a sight than made his blood burn and run cold all at once.

He wasn't really watching were he was going, just walking because that's all he could do. He thought about going down to the bar, but he knew that John would eventually show up. He shuddered to think about the damage most likely done to their hotel room. Staying the night with a friend was out of the question since he wanted to be alone, but he didn't have his wallet so he couldn't just go rent another room somewhere – besides, John had the rental in his name and Zack just let John drive them around instead of getting his own an getting one this late a night would be silly.

Then again John could never want him back and he would have to start doing things for himself. He hadn't done much of anything for himself, taking care of himself, since...since ECW. His eyes burned with unshed tears and he had to lean against a wall to get himself under control, he promised he'd never think about those days again.

As quickly as his eyes blinked closed and open again a tall figure was upon him. Body smashed against the wall and large hands wrapped around his neck. Another hand move his legs apart an the powerhouse before him moved within the space.

"Zack," the masked voice growled.

Once again harsh thin lips assaulted his mouth an pried it open against his will. Then hands moved down his sides to his hips, gripping them tightly as he was hoisted in the air an forced to wrap them around he man in front of him. His arms free, he beat against the chest, but for all he was worth he was only given a dark chuckle for his effort.

"Wanna play kid," the mouth hovered over Zack's neck before attacking.

"Please...no, please stop..STOP!" Zack screamed.

His blood ran hot when he heard the whimpered _please_ leave Zacks mouth and he was about to turn around an leave until his blood ran cold upon hearing the pleading _no_ follow. He froze, shocked, so had to endure hearing Zack scream an before he could act a figure stood behind Kane, bashing him in the head with a fire extinguisher. Kane crumpled to the ground on top of Zack an the man quickly rolled the weight off Zack an pulled him away.

"Curt? What..."

"You alright man, the hell is going on...where's John?" he heard Curt ask.

"We...we had a fight,"Zack sounded pitifully.

"Come on, you can stay with me for the night."

John didn't hear if Zack replied, just leaned against the wall until his heart could start working again. Fucking Kane, always fucking Kane and he almost...in a damn hallway! John clenched his fist, he wanted to brawl but the object of his destruction was currently KO'd in said hallway. The gym, he'd work it out in the gym. He would let Zack sleep it out in Curt Hawkin's room, he was a close friend of Zack's and then he'd get his man back tomorrow. For now he just wanted to get away.

Shrouded in the darkness of shadows Kane licked his lips as he watched Cena, his anger was always intoxicating. He wanted Zack in more ways that was humanly possibly, but he also wanted Cena; especially his anger. Cena's anger fed the hollowed feeling in his chest, made him feel so warm and full … he would do anything to keep that feeling.

**TBA**


End file.
